Tuesday, 29 October 2013

Winters

Like saying ‘hello’ when meeting a treasured friend
Like hugging the warmth of the sunshine
Like warm feelings that had been tucked away under warm clothes
kept in care for colder times

Like reasons to let people come closer
Like excuses to hold them tighter
Like a short day that begs to be lived to the fullest
Like a star-filled night that refuses to get over

You come back to me like an old lover

You whisper in my ears long forgotten songs
You play with my hair
You tickle my heart with your gentle breath
You fill my mind with your scent.

You come to me like an old lover
who will one day say goodbye again.

Monday, 28 October 2013

There are promises that you make to yourself
that will change the way you live your life; and sometimes
you will be able to see as you make them; other times
it’ll be years before you knew you were following a mantra
a motto, or something; and when you look back
it’ll shine through everything you have ever done
and you’ll love it or hate it; but years later, you won’t be able to
do anything about it.

I have made some promises too.

Like the promise I’ve made to never regret the evening I spent
swept in the arms of something I love; like reading poetry
Or listening and singing along to songs in the happiest voice,
Like the day when I chose to ignore a pending assignment
so that I could go and listen to two old men, both poets
as they recited words weaved in magic, casting a spell on me
And the wonder I felt when I saw them grow young
in the span of an hour or so.

And I will never look back with contempt or anger
at the things and people that once made me happy, so happy
that the world seemed brighter when I sat next to them;
and time got wings as I saw it fly by me; and every 'goodbye'
seemed too hard, and every 'hello' so warm..
Because it doesn’t matter if they made me cry, they also gave me
the time of my life; and I promise to be grateful
for each laugh, each smile.

To never regret the time I spent, making people laugh
making them happy, with jokes and stories; truth or fiction
but giving them a time they cherish; time spent with children
listening to their stories of toys and school; of puppies as they
wag their tails, smiling with their eyes and loving oh so completely,
like games played with my mother, or evenings spent with friends
times that needn't be recorded in diaries, and feelings that are hard
to put into words.

And I will never let anyone tell me, to look at my world
with anything but pretty heart-shaped rose-tinted glasses
Because the truth is, we’re all going to wear lenses anyway
so I’ll look at my world with hope and love and its beauty
and people for all the magnificent charm and joys they hold
each person with his own ways of giving out happiness
each person with her own way of showing that she matters.

I made promises to myself the other day
promises I should have made a long time back
promises I intend to keep for a long time to come.

Thursday, 24 October 2013

I feel cheated on, today
Because there is someone else out there who is
Living my life—wearing the shoes I would have picked
had I gotten to the store first; and in clothes
that actually belong to me; telling stories
that are hidden in the corners of my heart
And I don’t know how she knows, but she knows
And she flies, while I float around today,
holding on to temporary anchors as I search for wings.

Because there are no words for the things I feel
And reasons for what I feel, but I feel, so much
About so many things—like when I cross the road
And stare at faces that say to me- “you know,
I have an interesting story to tell”; and when I see
mothers holding daughters as they cross roads
and on the other end, daughters holding their mothers
who are children again, once their job is done
And how I laugh and smile and cry
Because I can see the circle of life; but there is no one word
Or even many, that can ever describe the warmth I feel
That sometimes burns the inside.

Because I can see time slipping through my fingers
and life passing by my eyes; while I’m consumed
in work that makes no difference to me, but have to do anyway
and the panic attack I feel, when I see the date
because it’s already October and my friend told me,
that the year ends in 74 days, and because I have no clue
where the rest of the weeks and months went away
And though I know I have changed a lot, as time added
something new to my eyes; I just wish there was some more time
so that I could stop and just feel the change as it occurs.

Because I cheat myself when I don’t say the things I feel
Like the words that sleep dreamy-eyed on the tip of my tongue
waiting for the day they’ll finally come out; and the fine line
between who I am and what I wish to be, and the game
I play as I cross over from here to there every once in a while
And because ‘love’ isn’t such a big word anymore, but ‘feelings’ is
And because you could hold hands and hug people all day
But that in no way means that they understand, or you do
And because we walk but don’t know where to go.

I feel cheated on today.


Saturday, 5 October 2013

Cheers to the being who does not keep
A hidden box at the top of the closet
Or in some corner of the heart
Or in its mind
Where it is covered
By the cobwebs of memory

A box that contains bits and pieces of paper
Words and dialogues
Quotes and lyrics
Photographs of smiles
And pictures of views
Letters that haven’t been opened in years
And phone numbers that will never be used
Pens whose souls left them
When their inks ran dry
And papers who knew they had died
When dust came to reside on them
Where once fingers touched,
And tears smiled.

A box
The box
The most dreaded box
The most loved one
The one there
But not really.

Cheers to the being
Who can let it go
Who can but throw
Away the things
That matter no more.

And I will come
looking for you
soon
but I have a box
as of now
to look after.